MC the FURT

New Year's Eve, freezing in the snow,
Nowhere to sleep, nowhere to go.
She walked into the discount store’s bright light,
Hoping for a job on a freezing winter night.

"Excuse me, sir," she said with a shiver,
"Can I work here? I’m a really good deliver... I mean, worker. I just need to eat."
But Manager NKGW jumped out of his seat.
"Ew, gross! What’s that smell? Did a skunk walk in?
You haven't taken a bath since... I don't know when!
You want a job? You look like a walking dirty rag!
Get out of my store before I need a barf bag, you hag!"
He spat on her shoes, gave her a nasty kick,
Laughed like a cartoon villain—man, this guy is sick.
She rolled into the snow, holding her freezing side,
While the boss strutted back to his plastic pride.

Strike one match—ooh, a roast turkey appears!
Strike two—hey Grandma, thanks for wiping my tears!
"But man, it’s still freezing, and nobody’s buying...
Let’s just light the whole box! No point in crying!"
Welcome to the Fire Sale! Everything is hot!
Igniting all the garbage in the parking lot.
The discount store is turning to a barbecue grill,
"Ah... so warm." She’s just gonna chill.

The fire spread fast to the uncleaned mess,
Cardboard boxes and corporate stress.
The whole store went up in a glorious blaze,
A bright orange party in the winter haze.
Inside, NKGW was running around,
Tripping over instant noodles, making a panicked sound.
"My store! My inventory! Somebody save the cheese!"
While the girl sat outside, enjoying the breeze.
"Wow, this is cozy," she said with a smile,
Roasting an imaginary marshmallow for a while.
The roof caved in with a beautiful CRASH,
Turning the Linoleum Odyssey into ash.

Morning came, the firefighters put out the glow,
Pulling out a body from the ashy snow.
It’s NKGW, coughing, barely alive,
Looking like a burnt piece of toast that didn't survive.
The little girl watched him on the stretcher, totally wrecked,
Stretching her arms with zero respect.
She looked at the boss, now dark as the night,
And whispered a joke in the morning light:

"Well, look at that mean old man, what a lack of luck...
He’s dirtier and blacker than me! What the f—"